taylor swift gif
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If there’s one thing I took away from interviewing Taylor Swift a couple of years ago, it’s that she’s highly intelligent. Unlike every other high-profile musician, Swift didn’t require my questions pre-interview. It was rare and surprised me at the time, but 30 seconds into the interview, I soon realised it was indeed because she could handle any curly question thrown at her. Case in point: her current sexual assault trial.

In 2013, Swift accused DJ David Mueller of groping her backside during a meet-and-greet photo opportunity. Mueller countersued and fiercely denied the allegations and as a result, the Bad Blood singer has taken the stand to testify and set the record straight today. In exchanges between Mueller’s attorney Gabe McFarland, Swift responds strongly, quickly and with dry-wit. Oh, and she also refused to address him as “Sir” and instead settled on Gabe. So we will too.

“Gabe, this is a photo of [Mueller] with his hand up my skirt – with his hand on my ass,” she said. “You can ask me a million questions – I’m never going to say anything different. I never have said anything different… I’m not going to allow you or your client to make me feel in any way that this is my fault. Here we are years later, and I’m being blamed for the unfortunate events of his life that are a product of his decisions – not mine.”

When Gabe suggested Swift could have taken a break from meeting and greeting fans after the alleged incident if she was indeed so truly distressed, she shot back, “And your client could have taken a normal photo with me.” Swift claimed she didn’t want other fans to know what had happened.

Gabe then questioned why no one saw the incident to her deadpan reply, “the only person who would have a direct eye line is someone laying underneath my skirt and we didn’t have anyone positioned there.”

But perhaps her best response yet was when Gabe told Swift there was no evidence of wrongdoing and that the “front of her skirt showed no signs of displacement.” Her simply response: “Because my ass is located at the back of my body.”

Don’t mess. 

thoughts?